Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Wizards versus Vampires...

This was just released a day or two ago, and makes me squeal excitedly every time I watch it ...


Yes, that's right, I'm a crazy obsessive Harry Potter devotee. Obviously I faaar prefer the books, but I have to admit, the last couple of films have been pretty good. And this combination super trailer thingy for both of the Deathly Hallows films is freakin awesome. I officially cannot wait! I started blabbering excitedly about it to a friend the other day, and she rolled her eyes and told me put a sock in it. Her eyes then lit up with an eerie, demonic glow when feckin Eclipse was mentioned. I'd forgotten it was out so soon. Cue crazed Twi-hards who secretly dream of being that plain but adorably clumsy girl that the babe-a-licious Edward desperately wants to kill randomly falls in love with. Oh, wouldn't we all love a guy to rip our stomach open with his teeth and inject us with poisonous venom to kill us so we could spend the rest of our existance watching all our friends and family grow old and die and constantly fighting that torturous desire to kill people? True love right there people.

Reasons Harry Potter is amazingly superior to Twilight in every possible way:

1 - If you were going out with Harry, you could actually enjoy a lovely day in the park with him without worrying that he might attract a bunch of ageing seventies hippies who think he's a disco ball. I think Stephanie Meyer was shmokin something when she came up with that idea; "oh, wouldn't it be just lovely if he sparkled?"
2 - You don't have to endure a horrible, agonising, painful, torturous death during which a half dead creature rips its way out of your stomach to be with Harry or any of his magical friends.
3 - They wouldn't sneak into your room at night and watch you sleep.

4 - The leaders of the magical world aren't dictating, bloodthirsty executioners who take great delight in causing you pain (alright, Umbridge is an exception).
5 - Bella is a whiny biatch. The second she falls for Edward and learns all about the Cullens, she ditches her boring old 'mortal' friend for the beautiful, mysterious, super-cool Cullens. The trio would never do such a thing.
6 - You'd never have to worry about Harry (or anyone for that matter) accidentally killing you and drinking your blood. Big plus.
7 - Edward is a one-hundred-and-eight year old virgin. Nuff said, like.
8 - Harry and the gang still hang out and have the craic, unlike Bella and co who are all so madly deeply totally devoted to each other that ohmygod they just think about each other all the time and whine about sappy mushy crap that normal people never say.
9 - The Twilight baddie vampires are so one-sided; they're just the baddies, and you hate them cos of that. There's waaay more to the evil side in Harry Potter. Almost everything has a back story, there's so much history and detail. If someone had just loved poor auld Tom, would he have gone on such a dictating murderous rampage as an adult? If Bellatrix's mother had played dolls with her as a child would she be such a psychotic weirdo?
10 - There's no risk of anyone falling in love with a baby...

11 - Harry breaking up with Ginny, and Edward with Bella, are both for the girls' own good. But Harry does it simply and cleanly, because he has a noble job to so. Ginny takes it well, being a grounded, normal person. Edward whines about putting Bella in danger, then disappears to meander about aimlessly and leave Bella unattended. Bella then totally flips out and spends her time trying to accidentally on purpose kill herself when she should clearly be in counseling
12 - Bella basically begs Edward to have sex with her. Bad message to send (although I suppose its ok because he convinces her to suppress her sexual desires until they get married. Yaaay, a teenage highschool wedding!) Then we're supposed to believe that a guy who's been dead for over a hundred years and has no running blood still has working swimmers and knocks her up?!
13 - Stuff actually happens in the Harry Potter final battle. People fight, people get injured, people die. The last Twilight book spends ages building up to this major showdown - they all even say goodbye to each other and Bella prepares her creepy little kid for her death. Then they all sit down and talk about stuff instead and everyone goes home happy. I want carnage!!!
14 - The detail and history in the Harry Potter world is just staggering; its akin to the histories of Middle Earth in Lord of the Rings. People actually write books about Harry's world, there's that much of it. Considering Edward's lot have been around for hundreds of years, they've done surprisingly little. Sure Emmet and Rosalie spent about a decade doing nothing but screw each other.
15 - Harry Potter has a theme park. Suck on that, Twilight.

At the end of the day, they are two completely different books, so I guess it's not really fair to pit them against one another - they just both happen to have sky rocketed in popularity and had a serious impact on popular culture. I was just a bit miffed at people who kept comparing the two, so that's my little conclusion on the matter. I have nothing against Twilight - I have read them all ... I just find Harry Potter superior in every single way possible. :-)


  1. Amen to that! :) Harry Potter all the way. People are going on about how Twilight is changing young people's literature etc etc. SORRY THERE, but if it wasn't for JK Rowling and Harry Potter, there likely would be no market for Twilight.

    HP got young people back into reading. And it sends tons of good messages to young people. Twilight gives teen girls dangerous messages about "true love" and wanting to die for some fella you've just met because he's handsome and wont talk to you. GAH.

  2. Ha love the pictures! totally agree, twilight irritates me, too moody! crack a smile would ya!

  3. Love this post! It's spot on! HP 4evs!

  4. Twilight and Harry Potter are very different, so maybe its not fair to compare them ... but if I were to put them against each other, I would have to agree and say Harry Potter is totally superior!!

  5. 'Twilight gives teen girls dangerous messages about "true love" and wanting to die for some fella you've just met because he's handsome and wont talk to you. GAH.'
    Haha, couldn't agree more! 'If he ignores me, I'll just almost kill myself repeatedly to show that I love him ... because he SPARKLES...'

    Yeah the pictures were a lucky find! That werewolf and baby one was particularly lucky... I was debating what exactly to type into google to get that...

  6. "I was debating what exactly to type into google to get that..."

    HA! don't wanna know... ;-)

  7. Haha! Love that stalkers poster! Laughed out loud!

  8. love the stalkers poster im a big fan of edward