Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Someone ready my private jet!

I have been in Cork for the past few days, so apologies to my wee blog for abandoning it. Unfortunately it rained pretty consistently so we didn’t do too much exploring ... we did get to visit the Fota wildlife park though, which is awesome. It’s kind of like a much more open zoo; for example, there were lemurs in the trees above us, kangaroos hopping past, and several llamas that seemed a little too friendly – I would have preferred them behind a fence actually. It was sort of like a walking safari park, in that the giraffes and such had a much larger enclosure than anything in a zoo. Actually, most of the animals did. I really think this is the way to go now. Don’t get me wrong, I love zoos, and Dublin Zoo is pretty spacious actually in comparison to some abominations I have been in (cough-BarcelonaZoo-cough), but wildlife parks like that are a much better idea. I’m a child at heart  :-)

We opted for the train down, due to stumbling across ten euro one way fares, and the bus home, because said cheap fares did not apply on the way back. The train was only three hours, while the bus was four and a half.

Four and a half hours. On a bus. With no bathroom.

You could fly to an entirely different country thousands of miles away in four and a half hours. You could fly to London and back twice. You could get a boat to Wales and back. Seriously though, Ireland is such a small country that it just shouldn’t be four and a half hours to anywhere!

I am not a fan of travelling in general, but if i have to do it, my preference goes as such:

I know, not a lot of people like boats above all else (now, when I say boats, I mean high speed ferries, like the HSS. Not rubber dinghies), but I don’t get sea sick, so I take full advantage of the fact that you can get up and walk around, you can go to the cinema, you go to a resteraunt, you can go to the shop, and for those smokers among you, you could nip out back for a sneaky fag. Yes, you can watch movies on a plane, but unless you’re minted and flying first class, you’re cramped and squished. And I know you can buy food on both planes and trains, but it’s a rip off on trains, and its bleughhh on planes. You can also walk around on planes and trains, but the extent of your walk for both is usually in a straight line aiming for the toilet.

To be honest, trains and planes would be joint second, as I find them both quite similar (well apart from the obvious fact that one flies). There’s not much room on either, but trains have that slight advantage in the fact that you don’t have to be there ridiculously early. Case in point – I am flying to New York at the end of the month and have to be there three hours before departure. Fabulous. Did I mention I’m travelling alone?? Also, you can usually just turn up and hop on a train. Not quite so much with a plane, they tend to get annoyed when you attempt to casually saunter on. “What? I need to have booked a ticket? Oh for god’s sake!”

Unless you have a fear of flying, if you are a child like me you will still get a thrill from planes. I love flying, and I love being above clouds. There’s also something deeply satisfying when you take off as you know you are off to a different country, usually for a holiday. Yay!

Last but not least, the dreaded peasant wagon. You can’t walk around, you can’t buy food, you can’t watch tv, you don’t get to marvel at the clouds, you can’t sneak out for a smoke, you usually don't even have a table so you can't entertain yourself with simple card games (is that too much to ask?) and on some buses there are even no bathrooms, despite your journey being across the damn country.

So yeah...
I. Hate. Buses.

Obviously at the end of the day I would rather take a luxuriously kitted out private jet everywhere, but this will not be happening for the foreseeable future. I’ll keep you updated on that.


  1. I bleedin LOVE those €10 one-way fares. Especially since my recent train journey to/from Westport was 3.5 many years of bus time is that??!

    Lincoln Park Zoo in Chicago was the worst I've ever seen for tiny enclosures and unhappy-looking critters. Unfortunately, its actually free to visit so I wasn't sure how to boycott it...

    Sigh, I wish I could share your enthusiasm for both boats and planes...varying degrees of motion sickness and general claustrophobia make me very wary of most kinds of motorised unfortunate tendency in one who loves to travel!:P

    I could possibly tolerate a private jet though...

  2. I love boats! I have to agree with you, buses are the worst way to go. And Barca zoo is awful :-(

  3. Oh I know, I have family up north so I've wasted countless hours/years of my life on trains to and from Belfast ... sigh, roll on the day they invent instant teleportation.. ;-)

    A free zoo? I wonder if that's why its so tiny! There were many unhappy looking animals in Barca, particularly a large, black panther in a cage the size of my living room. People suck sometimes.

    I used to get very bad motion sickness as a kid so I certainly feel your pain! I grew out of it eventually, but have you heard of motion sickness pressure point bands? I have no idea how, but I swear they worked!

    I forgot you'd been there Liz ... it makes Dublin Zoo look life a safari park.

  4. You were in Cork and you didn't alert me!? I'm a Dub currently holed up in the People's Republic...could've done an aul blogger meety uppy thing!

    I totally feel your pain, bus wise. Hate is not strong enough a word. xx

  5. Oh dear, a blogger meety uppy thing would have been lovely! Although it was a very breeze-in, breeze-out visit... got there on monday night and left again on wedensday afternoon! With a bitta drinking in between, although mid-week nightlife does not seem to be Cork's strong point!

  6. Boats and trains are definitely good means of transportation, but the downside is that they can only run when placed on a certain surface (e.g. water and rail track, respectively). Planes, on the other hand, can fly over land and sea. That’s why I understand why you like planes so much. They’re fast, comfortable, and you don’t have to worry about getting stuck anywhere while up in the air.