Thursday, August 19, 2010

Got my keys, got my money, got my ... ah no, I forgot to put a skirt on again!

This is a quickie, for two reasons:

Number One: I got up at half six yesterday morning, and didn't go to bed again until after eleven, having worked for most of those seventeen hours, and then got up again at half six this morning. Therefore, I'm bleedin wrecked, lads.

Number Two: I am still in disbelief regarding the subject matter of this post.

So, I was working out in the Wright Venue in Swords last night. They were having - as I imagine most club were - a Leaving Cert Results party. So there I was, merrily ticking names off the guest list and taking photos and generally wishing I was at home with a cuppa, when this one girl caught my eye for the absolute worst reason.

This girl looks like a perfectly normal girl ... she had short blonde hair, and was wearing a lovely top, with a jacket over it (wearing a jacket is just ironic ... you'll see why ...), and black heels with black knee high socks. Her bag was sparkly. She was wearing lots of bangles.

And underwear.


Ahh, you mean teeny hotpants, don't you Karin?

Nope. Actual knickers, like.

All I could think was, 'Love ... you forgot your skirt??"

I mean, everyone was staring at her. The door staff were pointing, the girls taking names were openly laughing ... I was certain they'd refuse her. Maybe gently remind her that she forgot her clothes, and perhaps she should go home and put a skirt on?

But no. In she whizzed, with everyone staring at her arse hanging out of her knickers! And like, they weren't even plain black knickers, like bikini bottoms or something, but actual freakin underwear, with a pattern on them. I was just in shock. And her boyfriend strolled in after her looking like she was Kate Moss or something! If I was a guy, I would just be utterly mortified if my girlfriend showed up on a night out without any pants on. And why even bother wearing a jacket? To cover up? Or in case you get cold?

I don't think I even need to say it and I know I sound like a fifty year auld biddy, but how could her parents let her out of the house like that?!

"Mam, how do I look?"
"Oh, lovely pet, just lovely! Although ... you seem to have forgotten your trousers?"

Bejaysus. I'm going to bed.


  1. sweet jesus! Not a chance in hell i would ever let her in if i was in charge!

    were they even nice knickers...?!

  2. Wow. When I started to read this I was like, oh they must be the large embellished leotard-type knicker/shorts that all the high street stores have in store?
    But... NOPE... by the time I got to the end, it was evidently clear that this girl was so desperate for attention that she turned up in her actual knickers. Poor love. There's no smell more pungent than the stench of tackiness and desperation!
    Great post tho! :)

  3. Oh I know, everyone that I told this story to thought the exact same thing - fancy hotpants! It took me a couple of goes to convince them that nooo ... it really was just knickers!

  4. Hahaha! That's hilario!
    Knickers?! Like not even Lady GaGa-esque knickers... no, full on 'this is my underwear' knickers. Oh dear!